A short history of Butt-Jokes.

I'm obviously just entertaining myself with this web blog thingie on the internets, so it really doesn't matter what I type here.

Or here.



Or here.

Or here.


So I'll have to leave you with today's magic word.


BUTT. as in "the butt butt buttt butt made butt butt!"

Why is that funny? I think that it dates back to Adam and Eve. After sinning, and running around naked for a bit, they quickly whipped up some clothes made of vegetables. I guess they were a bit flabby. Anyway, afterwards, God went searching for them, and while He was looking in north part of the Garden, Adam (A guy) said "Hey, I saw your BUTT!" and Eve said "Shut up!" But then she giggled, and Adam let loose with a whole series of butt jokes, and their giggling totally gave their hiding place away.

Later on in the Bible, some joker named Ham saw his dad's butt, and he apparently had a hard time keeping his butt jokes clean, and got in trouble.

The whole Bible is littered with ass jokes all over the place, because asses are funnier than butt, but aimed at a more adult audience.

Later in history, we have tales about Odima and his famous butt joke that started the Peloponnesian Wars, and we learned that we have to be careful with butt jokes. Choose your audience carefully. In this case, my audience is largely myself, and I'm a sucker for ass jokes.

The Great Depression in America started (some people think) due to a severe dearth of butt jokes. Some people claim that the President Frank "the pinko" Roosevelt was responsible for hauling our collective hinders out of the Depression, but it was really Joseph Goldberg, inventor of Butt Joke No#9090,435,094,112,889. Up until that time, people had been focused on jokes about the president, and the economy, and stopped using the time-honoured butt-joke. Joseph Goldberg found a collection of butt-jokes from WWI and carefully plagiarized a few until he grew confident enough to write one of his own. Soon the whole country forgot about their poverty/abuse at the hand of pinko corporate elitists, and started spreading butt-jokes like a thing that spreads quite fast, a zombie infection maybe.

Today, butt jokes are quite common, but they still aren't pulled off with much class, and are usually found in lower reaches of society, and the internets. You shouldn't have to look very hard to find butt jokes. If you need one, stop at your local elementery school, and ask a 3rd grader. Then you should run away really fast, because most people don't want you talking about butts with their third grade child, you jerk.

Keep your butt jokes clean, scrub them with double ply to get rid of the klingons. (haha)

That was practically the only bona fide butt-joke in this whole post.

Join me next time when I discuss Uranus.